Starting your very own vegetable patch



Tip 1: If this happens, cover everything in acid and move house. 

Green-fingered gardening enthusiasts are popping up all over the place. Is this because of the fear of chemically enhanced mega-vegetables that can kill a man with their eyes from 40 yards? Or the hipster led obsession with making everything (apart from your identity) yourself? Or maybe that the economy is in such a state that people are realising that its either pun on the sunglasses (and get out into the garden) or start eating that trashcan. Whatever the reason, more and more people now want to nurture their own food, to care for vegetables from seed to sandwich, to make a half-hearted flick of the wrist toward self-sustainability, to connect with themselves and the world through the very human activity of interacting with soil to make food. This is living, this is surviving, this is growing vegetables in your back garden. But how to get started? Do you simply buy a carrot and shout at it until it reluctantly multiplies? Do you take a potato and lock it in a room with a bigger potato and wait for nature to take its course? Do you buy a bunch of cucumbers, bury them in the ground, then dig them up when your friends come round to fool them all into thinking your a born again naturalist? No, none of that makes any sense. What you should do is keep on the backyard and listen to every word we write (once you’ve read them out loud to yourself).

Part 1: Location, location, aubergine. 


The first thing to do is to sit down. Yes! I know! You thought this was all going to be back breaking bending over and slaving away in our hot Australian Sun didn’t you, well not on your life. Yet. The first thing to do is to have a good sit in your garden and scope the joint out. Which area gets the most sun? Where is protected from wind? Where will get the most rain fall? Where is far from any weeds or paths? You have to think like a vegetable. If you were a vegetable, where would you like to be? This is easy because vegetables are not to dissimilar from humans, and the perfect vegetable patch is pretty much the same as a perfect sun bathing spot. Sunny and sheltered, thats the key. Chances are the vegetables most Australians will want to plant are annuals, so they grow quickly over a short time, this makes it all the more important to maximise the sun they will receive.  Make sure no trees are hanging over the patch, and any buildings, garden furniture or features, sheds, animals or people are throwing shade over your chosen hallowed turf. Wind is also a bad, bad, super bad, not good thing. Especially for plants that grow above ground (or as they are known to experts ‘air-plants’). Tomatoes and cucumbers cannot take the battering of a bisque boisterous wind. The young gardener must build something, anything, to block the wind, try a small wall, fencing panels, other plants, some hurdles, something! Just find something! Don’t let the wind destroy your dreams of vegetable glory! A straw bale can also help.


A straw bale

Well, thats only the first step, but theres a lot to think about there, and they’ll be a lot more to think about along the way. But it’ll all be worth it in the end!

Join us next time when we look at what to do first to your chosen piece of land.


Keeping Your Backyard Tidy

Cleanliness and tidiness, in my opinion, are the single two most important factors for the perfect backyard. Unfortunately, the backyard is one of the hardest areas of the house to keep tidy and clean, mainly due to it being outside.

Fortunately for you, I have put together a few essentials tips for a spotless backyard. Feel free to use any of these tricks, and your backyard will on its way to perfection in no time!

  • Start from the top and work your way down –  Start by trimming hedges, bushes and trees. You do this so you don’t end up with leaves and off-cut branches all over your nicely swept patio. Use pruning shears or tree shears.


  • Prepare a compost pile – If you’re a keen gardener, then I’m sure you will already have a decent compost pile. If you don’t then I suggest you start by raking or blowing all your fallen, dead leaves into a pile. If you don’t like the look of it, you can just have it in a secluded corner or under a cover.
  • Go after weeds ASAP Try to remove weed as soon as you can. The earlier you remove them, the easier it will be and it also halts their ability to spread throughout the garden.
  • If you have one, make sure your BBQ is thoroughly cleaned regularly  –  The benefits of a clean BBQ cannot be overstated. Firstly, a dirty BBQ can attracted some unwanted visitors to your backyard, which can cause all sorts of problems. Secondly, a dirty BBQ can also contaminate food being cooked on it. There are many professional oven cleaning services that also do BBQ cleaning if you really want to make sure its cleaned properly.
  • If you can’t do it, hire someone – The same goes for the BBQ cleaning, if you are in capable of doing some jobs, such as heavy lifting or cutting down large branches, there are always plenty of services available to help you out. From tree surgery to de-weeding, it easy to find any service you want.

Essential Backyard Furniture

Having the furniture in your backyard is very important. It makes it possible for friends and family to relax in the backyard comfortably. There are many pieces of furniture you can have in your backyard. However, there are those you should prioritise when purchasing backyard furniture. Below are some of the essential pieces of backyard furniture you should make sure you are packing.

The first thing you need to make sure you have in your backyard is a table. A table is very important especially if you want to spend some time relaxing with friends or with your family in your backyard. This is because; a table in your backyard makes it possible to take snacks to the backyard since you have somewhere to place them. When choosing a table for your back yard, it is important to make sure you choose the right size, material, shape and color you like. The material is probably the most important. You need to choose a table that is made from a material that can survive all kinds of climatic conditions. a good example is a table made of iron.


Stylish chairs are also very important to have in your backyard. You should choose your chairs depending on what your table looks like. For instance, if you have a rectangular table, the best choice would be to get benches since benches are long enough. Make sure that the seats are comfortable enough. This is important if you intend to relax on the seats from time to time. A good way to enhance the comfort of your backyard chairs is to use some cushions. However, if you decide to use cushions, it may be advisable to take them into the house when they are not in use to maintain them in good condition especially in harsh climatic conditions. The material of the chair should also be able to tolerate different climatic conditions.

Swings and hammocks are also essential furniture to have in your backyard. They are a good way to relax and add a sense of uniqueness to your backyard. When choosing the swings and hammocks, it is important to choose the ones that have good material that can withstand harsh climatic conditions.

Last but not least, It is important not to forget garden accessories when designing your backyard. These make the garden look beautiful and interesting. Choosing garden accessories that are a bit colorful is a good way to add life to your garden